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Singin’ I’m No A Billy He’s A Tim

Des Dillon's smash hit comedy, Singing I'm No A Billy He's A Tim, comes to Lanark Memorial Hall as part of it's 20th Anniversary tour!

Singin’ I’m No A Billy He’s A Tim

About Singin’ I’m No A Billy He’s A Tim

A play exploring bigotry and ethnic identity, “Singin’ I’m No A Billy, He’s A Tim” is a phenomenon in Scotland where it has sold out countless nationwide tours, a sensation at the Edinburgh Festival and now touring Internationally.

Written by Des Dillon and Directed by Stephen Cafferty. With Scott Kyle (Outlander, Angels Share, Kajaki and Winner of Stage Award for Acting Excellence), Colin Little (River City, Fried, Gasping, The Secret Agent) and James Miller.

Israeli vs Palestinian, Catholic vs Protestant, Celtic vs Rangers… When tribal factions clash can reason ever prevail?

What happens when on the day of the Old Firm Match, you lock up a Celtic and Rangers fan in a cell together?

Fireworks!

And a weird kind of unity.

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The Scottish Comedians

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The Scottish Comedians at Lanark Memorial Hall is guaranteed to be one of the funniest nights out you will have in 2025!

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The Spice Girls Experience

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Fresh off the back of their stint as opening act for Adele's Munich Residency, The Spice Girls Experience are super-excited to be touring the UK, don't miss them at Lanark Memorial Hall in June!

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The Ladyboys of Bangkok

26th June 2025

The Lady Boys of Bangkok return to Lanark Memorial Hall with a sensationally glamorous new show, a must-see new production for 2025 packed with fun filled comedy and outrageous cheekiness!

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Live Wire - The AC/DC Show

4th July 2025

The hugely successful and unique six-man tribute to rock music's greatest band AC/DC returns to Lanark Memorial Hall on Friday 4th July!

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Meet Me At Boots Corner

11th July 2025

The legendary meeting place for Glasgow's love's young dream, the iconic Boots Corner, is brought back to life in this hilarious musical at Lanark Memorial Hall!

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When We Were Young

25th July 2025

When We Were Young at Lanark Memorial Hall is both a hilarious and nostalgic look back to 1990s Glasgow as well as a heartbreaking story of stolen youth.

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Opera Bohemia: Tosca

27th July 2025

Scotland's professional touring company Opera Bohemia returns to Lanark Memorial Hall with a reimagining of Puccini's masterpiece, Tosca!

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Dinosaur Adventure Live: The Big Jurassic Storm

7th August 2025

Calling all dino fans... join an interactive adventure to save Volcano Island from a jurassic storm and meet incredible life-like dinosaurs when Dinosaur Adventure Live comes to Lanark Memorial Hall!

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Bitter Sweet

24th August 2025

Bitter Sweet, the incredible tribute concert to pop mega-stars Sabrina Carpenter and Olivia Rodrigo is coming to Lanark Memorial Hall for the very first time on Sunday 24th August!

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Totally Tina!

30th August 2025

Come shake a tail feather with the UK's supreme Tina tribute – Justine Riddoch – and her talented cast at Lanark Memorial Hall on Saturday 30th August!

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5,6,7,8 The Steps Experience

13th September 2025

Whether you are looking for a night of nostalgia or a party that will get you moving, 5,6,7,8 - The Steps Experience has it all, don't miss it at Lanark Memorial Hall on Saturday 13th September!

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Roy Orbison and the Travelling Wilburys Experience

19th September 2025

The Roy Orbison and the Traveling Wilburys Experience will take you on a journey through the story of the Wilburys, with expert narrative and big screen action, when it comes to Lanark Memorial Hall!

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The Eras Experience

20th September 2025

Calling all Swifties! Don't miss a Taylor Swift Tribute by Xenna at Lanark Memorial Hall on Saturday 20th September!

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The Vintage Explosion

27th September 2025

Get yourself along to Lanark Memorial Hall on Saturday 27th September for a night of astonishing Rock n roll, Soul & Rhythm and Blues from the amazing Vintage Explosion!

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The Spirit of Bad Company and Free

10th October 2025

Free Again, a five piece ensemble of musicians, will perform their spectacular new show that gives you a concert experience of 100 minutes of pure Bad Company and Free nostalgia!

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American Four Tops

11th October 2025

Direct from the USA, Soul Satisfaction's American Four Tops show returns to Lanark Memorial Hall on Saturday 11th October!

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A Squash and a Squeeze

14th October 2025 - 16th October 2025

Step into the magical world of A Squash and a Squeeze when this heartwarming and hilarious adventure, full of beautiful puppets and enchanting songs, comes to Lanark Memorial Hall!

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T.REXTASY

1st November 2025

'Get it On' when T.Rextasy play all of Bolan's biggest hits when they come to Lanark Memorial Hall on Saturday 1st November!

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Up A Close

8th November 2025

Following a 2024 Spring and Autumn sell out run across Scotland, Kingsman Travelling Theatre Company is absolutely delighted to be bringing Up A Close, Joanna's Story back to Lanark Memorial Hall!

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MacFloyd

15th November 2025

MacFloyd return to Lanark Memorial Hall on Saturday 15th November with a special show celebrating the 50th anniversary of Pink Floyd's classic album, Wish You Were Here!

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Emma Kenny’s Killer Couples

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Emma Kenny's Killer Couples promises an evening filled with intrigue, psychological depth, and discussions that will linger long after the show ends at Lanark Memorial Hall!

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Stuart Mitchell: Tips Not Included

21st November 2025

With over 100M views online see Stuart Mitchell, the longest running panellist from BBC Scotland's 'Breaking The News', live at Lanark Memorial Hall in his first national tour!

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Airdrie Town Hall Chatelherault Country Park East Kilbride Arts Centre East Kilbride Village Theatre Lanark Memorial Hall Lanternhouse Cumbernauld Rutherglen Town Hall Strathclyde Country Park The Town House Hamilton